Skewed

Let's say there's a car accident and four eyewitnesses.The reporting by everyone will overlap, but each person will also have his own perspective and a few different remembered details from the other three. I say this, because I might have shared experiences with a group of people, but each person in the group might remember it differently than I did. When I was around 9 , my maternal grandma had a picnic at her house. A picnic would be the only way Grandma could entertain a lot of company, because her home was the size of small apartment with a tiny bathroom,one bedroom, a small living room and smaller kitchen.I loved her pint sized house, because it was her home, and I loved my grandma. Anyway, the day of the picnic was sunny and warm ( not a cloud in the sky) and many of my relatives were there, although it wasn't a family reunion, because those were always ginormous events. Well,what I remember was injury,embarrassment,teasing,roughhousing,and self- pity. The pot luck lunch was delicious- my mom and aunts were great cooks- and I'm sure everyone there would agree on that point. However,that was the only great part of the get together for me. I stubbed my big toe ; I had Pepsi come out of my nose- no joke;my brother Gary punched me in the arm; my brother Jim ridiculed my outfit, and I felt miserable. Later, after we got back home, I must have been pouting, because my mom asked me what was wrong. I told her and she said that she hadn't seen or heard anything that had happened to me. Then here's what she told me: my father had hurt his wrist playing horseshoes; my sister Debra had found a dead bird and was crying; my grandma was upset because the toilet in her bathroom wasn't working; my rascal brothers had been at my Grandma's neighbors throwing acorns; my mom had gotten some bird poop on her blouse.Wow. We were all at the same place at the same time, but we were all having unique experiences, and I hadn't observed any of that??? It could have been the fact that I was nine, but "shared" moments still have narcissistic , self-absorbed elements to them, and our perspectives won't necessarily mesh with the other eyewitnesses to the event.Memories are selective and subjective.