River of Blood- Yung

Jillian was able to buy the young Korean girl for $230,000. Of course, Jill commenced with a much lower offer, but she was also ready to pay even more than she did.She secretly had already previously "bought" four other teenagers, and was able to return them to their parents, but Yung had no family, as far as Evelynn could determine, so Jill decided to let Yung stay with her.That was seven years ago.With English tutoring and culinary classes, Yung thrived and is happy. Jill was able to secure falsified documents, and Yung appears to be a legal immigrant of 23. Yung cleans, cooks, and speaks her mind. She rarely leaves the house anymore, but she makes everyone smile.She is the most innocent and naive of Jill's staff, and the bodyguards are very protective of her.Nevertheless,she doesn't seem to trust anybody but her Ms. Jill.

River of Blood -ABC crew

Abby, Barb and Cheri comprise the "ABC crew", Jill's 3 amazing and skilled bodyguards. All three hold black belts in various martial arts and regularly work out in Jillian 's terrace level state-of-the-art gym.Abby is a marksman; Barb is an Olympian for triathlon; and Cheri excels at Boxing.In peak physical condition, they do not drink, smoke or have any vices.In addition, Abby oversaw the installation of the million dollar security system, the vault,safes, the panic room and the " command center" with constant video surveillance of interior and exterior.They have shifts and rotations. One of the ladies is always in the center, 24/7;one is always with Jillian, and they take shifts to sleep, to check premises, to work out, or to take care of the trained dobermans. They are rarely together day or night, and they don't share living quarters.A well oiled and professional threesome,they do not "take any prisoners" and many men have miscalculated their physical allure and " skill set." They love their job and their boss.One night, an armed thief,trying to rob the Alexander home,came into the crosshairs of Abby.She could have easily shot him between the eyes, but she decided to let the dogs tear him to pieces instead.Not one of the three women suffers fools, and besides,warning signs are posted around the gated perimeter.

River of blood -Ruby

Ruby loved nursing and couldn't resist the fabulous pay raise she would get if she accepted Jillian Alexander's offer to be her private live-in nurse, besides paying for Ruby's divorce and giving her all the benefits she could possibly want.Jillian paid her court fees too, for the felony charges concerning the poisonings. The evidence had disappeared from the police department , and Jill's competent lawyer, Evelynn,had helped so much, so Ruby was found not guilty.She has enjoyed the last four years of employment with Jill,and her leisure time is often spent doing laps in the indoor or outdoor pool.She will earn her pay when she helps Jillian kick her heroin habit,and then there is the yet- to -be -known young woman whose branding at the Querencia will need to be tended.

River of Blood- the "querencia"

The passcode and location changed every quarter. Tonight the code is " balderdash" ,and the place is Jill Alexander's home. Jill hasn't hosted the Querencia in four years, so she wants it to be unique, with no expense spared. She requested her cook Yung to hire some of the usual bartenders and waiters and get as much help as she needs for the kitchen duties.ABC were put on alert to be extra vigilant and check all vehicles and guests before they are even allowed through the estate's gates. No phones or cameras allowed.The only open rooms will be on the main floor and everything else will be locked; that should be sufficient.The night's theme is "Masque of the Red Death", and everyone will wear masks, stilettos and not much else.All was in order and soon the invited would arrive. Jill knows most of the 50 or so guests, except the newest members and their partners.She didn't go to the last few soirees, so she looks forward to seeing some of her intimate friends, and catching up on the recent gatherings.She's especially excited to seeing two significant friends - Maya Benicia, a former lover, and Lina Dontay who is the powerful matriarch of this covert group and Jillian's longtime mentor. So far, Jill had not chosen "the one". She would decide arbitrarily later on in the evening.As host, it fell to her to select the worthy individual who would participate in the unique ritual, the climax of the evening, always done at 1 am. Jillian had been that fortunate person years ago , and now she highly anticipated tonight's events for the next initiate.Of course, the ceremony is not without pain,so Ruby, her nurse, will be on hand to administer a sedative and the necessary assistance after the the branding. Although it wasn't expected, Jill will offer to let the young woman stay at her house, and have Ruby care for her, during the healing process.It had taken about 6 weeks for Jill's upper thigh burn to be tolerable , so she guessed it could be about the same for whomever she chooses.The selected woman receives $500,000 for her performance;S&M is involved. She can decline, but nobody has done that, so far. Just in case, Jill will have an alternative person in mind.She anticipated an exciting and highly satisfying evening.

Time to go

Not now; not ever.Stop the whining; stop the self- pity. You're not the victim;you're the problem.Reap what you sow.You've been let off the hook too long, and at other people's expense. Be safe, but be gone.Waited and hoped to no avail.Please leave.You've overstayed your welcome by about five years.

River of Blood- Evelynn's fantasy

Flaying-now there's a torture that appealed greatly to Evelynn. She had been mulling over the excruciatingly delicious idea ever since she was fourteen and saw the searingly memorable painting of" the Flaying of St.Bartholomew".That was two years after she had been first sexually assaulted. She savored the agonizing pain of Theon Greyjoy in "Game of Thrones" and frequently fantasized about torturing her sexually abusive brother in this manner.It would be medieval and cruel;she smiled at the idea. Jillian was the only person, outside Evelynn's immediate family, who knew anything about Garrett's chronic incestuous rape of his much younger sister. Her parents had turned a blind eye,so Evelynn left home at sixteen to live with her aunt in a different state.She couldn't stand for anyone to touch her; hugs made her cringe. She finished law school and passed the bar, planning to work with underprivileged women.She met Jillian Alexander at a charity event, and they became fast friends. Jill became Evelynn's closest confidante and promised to help her get justice,if Evelynn would work for her, and so she did.Evelynn's flaying knife's "kiss" was biding its time.

DC monuments

I was recently in Baltimore to see a very dear friend who is critically ill. While there, I did spend a day visiting DC,and I took a night tour of the city's monuments and memorials.It was fantastic, yet sobering, and I felt a reverence for all the honored and remembered vets. I had never been to the WW2 memorial, nor the Korean memorial nor the Vietnam memorial. They were beautiful and thought provoking. I hadn't seen the MLK monument before, and it was truly majestic.Of course, the Jefferson and Lincoln memorials took my( very cold)breath away.DC is a tremendous gem, and I still haven't seen half of the Smithsonian museums either. If I lived closer, I would have exciting and free mind candy to take in for months.The people who live there are tremendously fortunate to have so much history, beauty, and free admissions at their fingertips. I wonder if they take advantage of this incredible gift.

Disinfected

Voodoo doll,pricking pins.Old photo marred by dart holes.Shattered bowl from wedding register.Unworn lingerie ignited by gasoline.Five inch stilettos in one foot snow.Picture window covered with mud.No time for despair.Somebody has to do it.

a break

I'm taking a week off from writing, because I'll be out of state. I am having a brain drain anyway.

Al's birthday

Alfredo and I have been together 40 years.That doesn't seem possible, yet it is.Today is Al's 61st birthday. We have grown up together; we have grown children together; we are growing older together. We have had mountaintop experiences, and we have been through deserts of difficult times. We have persevered; but more than that, we have thrived. I thank God for our marriage,and how hardworking, loyal and honest he is as both a loving husband and terrific father.

Award season

I love watching the awards shows, especially GG,SAG and Oscars. However, the actors, movies, etc. I pick aren't usually chosen as winners. Nevertheless,Here are my choices: Best actress: Cate Blanchett(Blue Jasmine) best actor: Christian Bale( American Hustle)- close second: Joachim Phoenix ( Her) Best movie:Her Best screenplay:American Hustle Best supporting actress: Jennifer Lawrence(American Hustle) Best supporting actor:Michael Fassbender( 12 years a Slave) Best Director : David Russell ( American Hustle) My prediction, however, is that "12 years a slave " will win many more awards than it should for the PC crowd. TV Best actor: James Spader(Blacklist) - close second: Liev Screiber( Ray Donovan) Best actress:Robin Wright( House of Cards) Best drama: Downton Abby ( G of T and Boardwalk Empire weren't nominated) Best Comedy: Big Bang Theory
( too bad the writers for BBT don't have a category) Best supporting actor: Jon Voigt( Ray Donovan) Best supporting actress: Jacqueline Bisset( Dancing on the Edge

River of Blood: Pauline's dilemma

Pauline wisely accepted Jillian Alexander's intriguing offer( insert " Godfather" line here), but she had one issue- her daughter Remy. Since before her life changing operation, Pauline has had a restraining order not allowing her near her ex-wife or their daughter.Pauline has come to terms with this fact, except for her inability,as a result, to watch over Remy and keep her as safe as possible. Remy, confused by her father's transsexual operation and ashamed of his prison time, holds her dad in contempt, and doesn't want to see him in any case. After her father's conviction for involuntary manslaughter,Remy stopped seeing him, and never contacted him in any manner. That didn't stop Pauline from loving her daughter or worrying about her. Pauline's request to Jill was to have a trust fund with an" anonymous" benefactor established for Remy, which could be accessed when Remy turns 18. Pauline wanted financial security for her daughter, since Pauline's new position could be "hazardous." Jill agreed.

River of Blood: Alina's interview

The candidates' interviews,so far, went well, Jill mused. After extensive time with Sharon C., Myrtle R., and Pauline M., she decided that they were very suitable for the delicate projects she envisioned. They had all made their personal requests beyond the excellent compensation package they were to receive, and those requests would be honored.The last to be interviewed would be Alina Buitrago, who was punctual and well dressed.However,her facial deformity was severe.Jill wanted a detailed account. Alina's left cheek and jaw area were just now scarring after being horrifically attacked with acid that had been thrown at her 11 months ago.She was "lucky" that she had been with a group of college students that ghastly night, and two women who were medical students heavily rinsed her burning face with water to mitigate the effects while the ambulance was being dispatched.For endless weeks, the excruciating pain was insufferable; she was in a morphine daze for months. She tried to continue her Medical school classes, but had to withdraw for 2 semesters;maybe even another year would be needed. She stopped running; sweat and wind were her face's enemies.She wondered if she would ever run another marathon. She wanted her life back, and perhaps Ms.Alexander could give it to her.Jill Alexander first became aware of Alina through Evelynn's research. Evelynn had been instructed to find women who had suffered abuse, bullying,misogyny and the like , and who may well be misandrists. While at medical school in the States, Alina's whole family had been killed by the FARC in Colombia, but not before her mother and sisters had been raped and tortured. She heard about their deaths two months after the fact, once their bodies had been identified. This, combined with Alina's attack, made Misandry feasible. After two hours into the interview , Jill explained the conditions and purposes for Alina's possible contributions to the developing team. Alina sat quietly, raising her eyebrows once in a while and nodding her head as if in agreement. Besides the superlative compensation package Jill offered, Ms.Alexander also would pay for medical costs involving facial surgeries, pay Alina's med school costs,and allow her time to get back to a structured running regimen. Did Alina have any requests? " Yes," she said quietly."I want your help in poisoning that SOB Rodriguez who threw acid on me; perhaps we could use oxalic acid or hydrocyanic acid.I think that would be great irony.Based on what you have shared with me, he could be a trial run for our group.Just one more thing.I want to watch him die."

200 posts, 14,000 views

I now have 200 posts on my blog and almost 14,000 views.I didn 't know if I would/ could last this long doing a blog with random ideas, but so far so good as the cliche goes. For all you who read my words, thank you so much.Thank you, too, for my viewers in Malaysia and Germany! I have been writing semi- regularly since this past March, and it has been a great outlet for me.Now I have been toying with the idea of going to the next level - writing a fiction crime story. I am putting snippets of thoughts on the blog under the working title " River of Blood" , maybe "blood river"( allusion to Dante).These particular posts began on 1/4. I don't think that the story will be the great American novel, but I sincerely hope that the writing will be a good first effort. Comments on the related posts are appreciated. Again, thank you for your support.

River of Blood: Myrtle's dream

Something woke Myrtle; she wasn't sure what.The clock read 4:00am, and the room was chilly.She had been having the same, wonderful dream that she regularly had for the last six years: Sunny and warm,the cloudless cerulean sky made Myrtle smile.It was midsummer and the ocean waves were soft; the small speedboat only rocked the least little bit.It had been her husband's idea to take the boat out and do some fishing ; it was a great idea, she thought. She got out her old binoculars and took a 360 degree look. The shoreline was almost out of view on the horizon, and no other boats were in sight.She took off all her clothes and folded them neatly, putting them under the tarp.The sea air felt soothing on her pale, overweight, naked body; she felt liberated. Puzo, her sodden husband, was fishing, smoking an awful smelling,cheap cigar, all the while barking orders at her to do this or that.Soon he would pass out- not from his horrible tasting Lemoncello,but from the strong sedative Myrtle put in each of the four refills. At last the cigar fell out of his mouth,the fishing pole dropped and Puzo Rinier slumped in his folding chair.She waited a couple minutes more and then she went up to him and started hitting him on the back of the head with the hammer she brought with her on board. She must have hit him twenty times or more.One time for each of his affairs, she thought.It was exhilarating! His skull and face were a bloody pulp. She knew he was dead but she kept pounding him anyway.Yes, she thought.Good riddance! She did everything the Internet explained , and she finally got his weighted down body into the water. Afterwards, she sat in the bloody chair exhausted but satisfied.A while later,Myrtle took the boat back nearer the shoreline,threw the chair and hammer over the side, cleaned up the boat with bleach,washed off in the cool but bearable ocean, put her clothes on and reached home before dark. Myrtle loved having this dream. If she were a different person, perhaps, it would be a nightmare. Instead it was a comforting, consistent reminder that she had done the right thing.

River of Blood - Story I may be writing

Since 1/4, I have been posting preliminary background for a crime story that I may be writing. I will finish this week with my initial ideas, and then I will move on to other posts not related to the story. I would appreciate any comments related to "River of Blood" posts, either on the post page or email.

River of Blood- preparing dossiers

Jillian and Evelynn had discussed basic criteria and characteristics for possible women to interview,and Evelynn narrowed the field of candidates,making dossiers on four particular women: anger towards men// killing for expediency and/or enjoyment// justification for behavior// lack of close relatives//strong need for revenge// Ability to follow through with action//not adverse to violence// clever and focused //moral ambiguity// question marks: ability to follow orders? What will be the price for each one's commitment? What are strengths and weaknesses- including health ( and possible exploitation)? Will she be willing to be only a piece of a larger puzzle? Unknowns: bonding, trust, loyalty... Sharon- physically strong, enforcer/torturer? Pauline- criminal connections and gay/ lesbian network , speaks Mandarin, Arabic? Myrtle- patience, persuasive,"grandmotherly" ,can appear empathic, likes children? Alina- youth, energy, social media, speaks Spanish,Portugese,Italian and French,entire family killed by FARC? Jill- almost unlimited resources, political connections, "A" list connections? // Info for author- Vocabulary:Misandry, vitriolagE,gender symmetry,Lavinia Fisher,battered wife syndrome,Elizabeth Bathory,kill team// Dante's "Inferno" , Cantos XII-XIII, 1st ring,seventh level.

River of Blood -premise

Jillian "Jill" Alexander has a State-of-the-art security system on her gated property , 3 highly skilled female guards(Abby,Barb and Cheri)- the ABC crew- who adore her,Evelynn- an inseparable and invaluable all- around personal assistant( techie and lawyer) who Jill trusts implicitly, a live- in divorced RN named Ruby ,and Yung her incredible Korean maid and cook.She pays her employees-all women- exceedingly well, treats them with respect, and demands absolute loyalty and discretion.Jill had one major weakness - heroin. She needed to get clean, before she could initiate a bold plan she had been considering for over a year.So, Jill decided that she was going to go cold turkey in her home with the discreet help of her female cohort.She had put off the inevitable withdrawal pain, but she had become a nonthinking slave to the onerous drug, and her self- loathing that ensued was enough to make her do the excruciating work.She randomly thought about the fact that she wouldn't be wearing sleeveless dresses for a very long time. Jill would need the strength and help of all her staff to beat this.Meanwhile,Evelynn had done all the extensive research needed,and it was left to Jill to interview the screened, potential participants for the upcoming long -term projects that she hoped to get started in the next few months.Her first interview will be with Sharon Chiron.

River of Blood, a little bit of back story

They don't want husbands.All of them " tried " marriage, and all of them were miserable, except for Alina course, who is still a virgin, but then her disfigurement will make a relationship difficult anyway./////Pauline de Montfort, while she was Paul, had an ex-wife and a daughter;now, she is not allowed to have contact with either one.////// Sharon Chiron's husband was very abusive. She tied him up one night while he was passed out from drinking, cut out his tongue and cut off his testicles.She enjoyed watching him slowly - albeit quietly- die; it took almost a week.///// Myrtle Rinier knew about her husband's affairs and put up with it, but when Mr. Rinier said that he was going to have a child with another woman, she snapped.He had regretted marrying a "barren" woman, who wasn't even Italian like he was. Rinier has been missing for six years;soon,Myrtle will be able to have him pronounced legally dead.///// Jill, still beautiful and alluring, although the heroin was beginning to ravage her, had been married the longest- almost twenty years, but the inevitability of her husband falling in love with a younger woman occurred; her divorce settlement was extraordinary and legendary.She is very rich. A couple years after her divorce, her ex-husband and his fiancé died in an apparent terrorist nightclub bombing./////

"Phlegethon:River of Blood" ,possible characters for story

Sharon:Her sundry collection was growing, and she was running out of glass jars to house each piece: hairy ear with the gold earring, brown eyeball,large sized broken nose, various digits from random nail polished fingers and toes, pierced tongue, tattooed areola,front tooth with roots, and a shriveled, ugly set of testicles.///// Alina: The quick verdict was not the result she wanted to hear.Still burning from the acid thrown on her face,she came covered up to court so she could see her unemotional attacker be convicted of his horrific,disfiguring crime. He was found not guilty by reasonable doubt.This was not acceptable.///// Myrtle: Cleaning the soup kitchen tables gave her joy and peace.She was glad that the homeless women and children were out of the bitter cold for a while and able to have a decent meal.She will take one female and her children home with her for the night. She wanted to help with the exhausted woman's three little children and give them a real bed to sleep in. It would not be difficult to kill the unsuspecting,half-starved mother.///// Jill: Feeling nauseated and shaky, she recognized the withdrawal symptoms and was searching frantically for enough cash to score.She didn 't want to trade another piece of her jewelry, but her body was aching,and her interest checks wouldn't be here until next week.///// Pauline: She was thrilled to be starting her new life! No longer Paul, no longer mocked and unhappy, she could begin to be who she always knew she should be.///// Sharon- 40ish,nondescript clothes, bald, chemo,Bi-racial // Alina- 23, athletic,collegiate, very long, black tresses, virgin,vengeful,Colombian // Myrtle- mid thirties,stocky, no make up, very short light brown "boy" cut, lonely,unable to have children,Caucasian// Jill- very expensive clothing,40ish,facelift,blond with highlights,heroin addict,ex- trophy wife,WASP// Pauline- 30, tall, thin, flamboyant dress, redhead by choice, lots of jail time, troubled past,Asian American///// Setting- either Detroit or Atlanta ( urban), present time

My magnificent mom

Today I am thinking fondly of my beautiful mother and the many wonderful lessons she indirectly taught me through example( the best way).She died 25 years ago today, and not a day goes by that I don't think about her.She died way too young at age 57.She was seriously ill many of those years, and she coped with a lot of tragedy; she frequently demonstrated "grace under pressure." The Bette Midler version of the song "Wind Beneath My Wings" is my anthem for her. She was my hero.She was not college educated although she could have excelled. She was a traditional, stay-at-home mom who was the glue of our family. She was very orderly, organized and fastidious with the small home where I grew up.6 people, 3 bedrooms,1 bath, but we were comfortable. Her bedroom was pristine and nary a thing out of place. That small room seemed like a haven to me and was very soothing, where I could smell the faint fragrances of Oil of Olay and dusting powder, and smile. I was rarely " upset" with Mom; I was usually in awe of her. She cooked like a kitchen witch, and about the only food she prepared that I couldn 't swallow,so to speak, was liver. Mom could do anything creative that she put her mind to doing- painting, ceramics, sewing, knitting, crocheting, decorating. She could stretch a dollar very far, and always had two ongoing slush funds- for the annual family vacation and for Christmas.My parents lived modestly and frugally, but even though they didn't have a lot of money, my mom "gave" generously of her time and energy to many wonderful causes.Also,Mom was an avid reader and loved to listen to Broadway musicals.I guess I got both of those interests from her.My mom didn't smoke, rarely had a drink, and almost never cursed.She loved entertaining, and she( and Dad) taught me manners, respect and showing Love.I was fortunate to have a stable, loving childhood, and a great personal relationship with my parents when I became an adult; in fact, they lived with Al and me the last few years before she died. My mom was not pretentious, nor arrogant, nor mean-spirited.However, she ran a tight ship and had high expectations of us. She was very wise and gave me sage advice.She influenced me greatly - religion, politics,travel,the Arts,food,family, loyalty, morals, candor and character.Of course she wasn't perfect;I know she was very opinionated and controlling - I have those failings as well.She wasn't shy about showing emotions; neither am I.( In fact, I wish I had more of my dad's stoicism.) Still, I think that as far as all the quality people I have known, she is right up at the top of that list.

Anti- social behavior disorder

She imagined that the evil woman was dead; that gave her some happiness.Do voodoo dolls work? She wished the demon's persistence in her life would just evaporate, go away, leave her alone; that wasn't happening. Vermin thrive on getting reactions, like a wasp that can keep on stinging and can 't be swatted.All pretense gone, all good will gone, hope hanging by a thread. Not all people are good; evil exists. The bad ones want you to believe they are "good". They feed on guilt and right intentions, because, for them, kindness is a weakness to be exploited.They want you to forgive and forgive and forgive , because that is how they believe they can manipulate you. If you were to " give up on them", you aren't turning the other cheek enough. My daughter knows Christian doctrine well enough to use it against me and rationalize her offensive behavior. She knows it well enough to be able to house hop( as she calls it) and rely on the kindness/ weakness of others. Grifters can play quite convincing victims and are pathological liars who delude themselves as well as others.Sociopath, also called " anti- social behavior disorder" is not curable or even manageable in most cases.That it comes in the form of a child or teenager is often dismissed as age related, but they do not grow out of it; it becomes finely tuned.Sociopaths are very casual/ blasé about their hurtful actions; they are true narcissists, although they would adamantly deny their self- absorption. My brother Gary was like this, so I picked up on my daughter early on , but my feelings were dismissed by family, friends and psychiatric professionals. The link www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html explains the behavior well. If you have never encountered or been "had" by a Con artist , consider yourself fortunate. I have known three quite well: my brother, my daughter and an in-law. They leave quite a destructive path. They are not violent( then they are psychopaths), but their "marks" are very violated.

Do I seek drama ?

I know a couple of women who have not ever had real drama in their lives. It doesn 't seem possible , but it 's true. I envy that. How do I draw so much BS to me? I don't seek it, but it sure finds me. My daughter is a drama queen, and I have friends and family who have horror stories of their own. Some people are lucky to have "functional" lives; I'm not one of them. Yes, I'm healthy and all that, but I would like to have a peaceful coexistence with certain significant people in my life, and that isn't happening. I get perturbed when I hear, "change your attitude and your reaction, and all will be better." Well, no, not if the people you are trying to get out of your life, keep sticking knives in your back or minefields in your path. I have a few authentic, intimate friends.That truly is enough for me, but even some of them have truly disappointed me or stretched our friendship ties. Of course, maintaining close relationships is work, but I try to forgive and make the genuine effort to sustain a substantive , meaningful tie with those individuals.I consider myself a pretty active, concerned listener with real empathy.Some women I know talk a lot more than they listen.I recently recognize that I too have been talking more than listening.I am truly sorry about that, because some of them must be tired by now of my litany of concerns about my daughter. Yea, it had pretty much consumed me during 2013. I will do better about this in 2014.